Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
