everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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