drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Randomize
