We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
