I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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