Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
