Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
