Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
