sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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