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Kiss
Puke
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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