I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
