I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
