Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
