Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
