She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
