The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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