that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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