All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
