i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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