At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Fuck appropriateness.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
