went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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