She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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