Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
