I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize