Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
