how can u be prego again
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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