Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
