She went from zero to smokin in five shots
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
