Rock
Scissors
Fuck
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Randomize