my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
Randomize
