The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
