When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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