READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
