omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
