I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Randomize