This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize
