they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
