I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
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