goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I want her autograph on my taint
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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