If that was your dad, he is hot
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
