I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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