what if every blade of grass was a penis?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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