Texts From Last Night

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  (941): View more from Florida

  so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.

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  (941): so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation. http://tfl.nu/o6ey
  Replies (41) Good night (944) Bad night (10424)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.

  (404): View more from Georgia

  you should get a family discount.

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  (770): I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer. (404): you should get a family discount. http://tfl.nu/bl35
  Replies (33) Good night (11042) Bad night (1561)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...

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  (240): He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me... http://tfl.nu/wuq4
  Replies (12) Good night (2911) Bad night (4540)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  What's he like?

  (954): View more from Florida

  The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.

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  (407): What's he like? (954): The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess. http://tfl.nu/zcji
  Replies (29) Good night (7620) Bad night (1233)
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."

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  (270): You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money." http://tfl.nu/lp5j
  Replies (6) Good night (2435) Bad night (745)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.

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  (360): you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own. http://tfl.nu/6swo
  Replies (5) Good night (2117) Bad night (544)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.

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  (610): You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me. http://tfl.nu/fg9o
  Replies (1) Good night (1252) Bad night (490)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.

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  (214): I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice. http://tfl.nu/9nit
  Replies (5) Good night (1178) Bad night (659)
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  (845): View more from New York

  just woke up under a car ? That's odd

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Holy fucking shit

  (845): View more from New York

  WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT

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  (845): just woke up under a car ? That's odd (603): Holy fucking shit (845): WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT http://tfl.nu/jvxr
  Replies (8) Good night (3348) Bad night (683)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.

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  (865): No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing. http://tfl.nu/ca26
  Replies (1) Good night (868) Bad night (474)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.

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  (405): Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again. http://tfl.nu/vkin
  Replies (2) Good night (840) Bad night (536)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.

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  (970): Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way. http://tfl.nu/gitq
  Replies (0) Good night (380) Bad night (721)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.

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  (719): No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos. http://tfl.nu/xmoj
  Replies (1) Good night (420) Bad night (137)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it

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  (413): I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it http://tfl.nu/6oww
  Replies (4) Good night (248) Bad night (483)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels

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  (410): i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels http://tfl.nu/vpxw
  Replies (1) Good night (286) Bad night (155)

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