Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i just google imaged poop.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
