You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.