She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Randomize
