He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
