So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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