just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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