You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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