"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
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i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
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Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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