your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize
